Angel of Manhattan
by The-KLF
Summary: AU: "I know it's been quite some time since we were last in contact, but the time has come. She's the one, Richard. And you're right, she is extraordinary." [on unplanned hiatus due to Ficathon - sorry!]
1. Chapter 1

_What a night._

Richard Castle sat down at his desk at something past one A.M. with a contented sigh. He'd had an eventful, but ultimately enjoyable, evening. First the book launch party, which was the usual tedium, but then it'd been turned on its head by one Detective Kate Beckett. _God, she's incredible_.

A scroll of ancient paper materialised on the table in front of him, amid golden twinkles. _Huh, just like in the movies._ He undid the silk ribbon and opened the scroll, his eyebrows rising as he read the excruciatingly perfect writing.

"_I know it's been quite some time since we were last in contact, but the time has come. She's the one, Richard. _

_And you're right, she is extraordinary."_

_Quite some time?!_ He shook his head. Quite some time was something of an understatement. The last 'contact' was when he was in college, when he'd started writing his first novel. He'd met a guy in a bar who spent an entire evening trying to convince him that he was the Angel Gabriel, that he should expect a mission from God sooner or maybe later, that he was going to be a great writer, that his books would help people. He hadn't taken it at all seriously, he was writing a murder mystery novel for crying out loud. The guy seemed delusional and was probably drunk. If angels could even get drunk, that is. But then he'd spoken to his mother about it, confided in her in a moment of uncertainty. And as it turned out, this kind of thing ran in the family.

_Oh, I need to tell Mother_. He stood and went to find Martha.

* * *

"Oh Richard, that's wonderful!" She waved her arms and looked genuinely happy for the first time in... well, as long as he could remember.

"Thank you, Mother." He tried to smile, but it didn't really reach his eyes. Martha fixed him with a steely glare that had him looking at his feet. "What if I mess it up?" He looked back up at her. "What if everything goes wrong, and my reason for being here pushes me away?"

Martha regarded her son, watched as years seemed to fade away and he was that scared 18 year old boy again. "Richard, darling, don't be silly."

There was a pause. She didn't know what else to say, and he was struggling to form coherent thoughts, to find words to convey how he remembers every face, every name, every detail of his life without any effort. But then, Martha knew all that anyway. Like mother, like son.

Finally, he whispered, "I've met her before." Martha blinked in surprise. "She came to a book signing, years ago. Only once though, not like the ones who only came to show some cleavage and slip me their numbers. She was shy, haunted... Breathtaking. I wanted to ask her to wait, to get a chance to actually talk to her afterwards, but I couldn't get the words out."

Martha looked at him with pity and compassion, shaking her head slightly. "And you want to know why you didn't receive the scroll back then, am I right?" He just looked at her. "I have no idea, kiddo. Maybe she didn't need you then." She gently placed her hand on his arm before he could reply. "I know, I know. Maybe she did need you. But maybe she wasn't ready yet." Martha paused dramatically. "Maybe _you_ weren't ready yet." She smiled, "Do you really think I was ready when my scroll arrived?"

Castle frowned. It wasn't like they had never talked about this. "But Mother, whether you were ready or not, you never had to convince one-day-old-me that I needed you to stick around."

* * *

Sitting opposite her in the conference room at the precinct, it all seemed a bit too easy. He'd sweet-talked his way in and now he had to convince her he wasn't going anywhere without sounding like a complete jerk, which wasn't going as well as planned. _I'm here for the story...?! Seriously, Rick, is that the best you can do?_ He repressed the urge to groan outwardly at himself.

"Sometimes there is no story. Sometimes the guy is just a psychopath."

_And she's clearly not buying it. _A floating lightbulb flashed over his head and he began to profile her. He threw out the vague outline of her life's story and reeled her in like the biggest prize fish he'd ever caught. And then he saw the way her face fell and wished he'd just kept his mouth shut.

"Cute trick. But don't think you know me."

_That was close._ "The point is, there's always a story. You just have to find it."

* * *

_Shit shit shit, no, Beckett get out here!_

"Hey... Hey!" One shoe off and one shoe on, he got the cuffs off and ran after the suspect, spare shoe in one hand and phone in the other. "He's coming down the fire escape!"

Beckett turned to the other cops in the room, "He's out back, cover the front." Then she headed out of the window, shouting at the guy, "Stop! Police! Don't move!" But he just kept running, and Castle kept chasing him. "Castle, no!"

"I got him! I got him!"

"Castle!"

She saw the rest of it happen in a slow-motion whirl, almost like she was anticipating it. The gun, the way he got himself taken hostage, the fact the safety had been on and he hadn't told her. Still, he knew the anger she showed towards him when it was over was just to hide the relief that he hadn't gotten himself killed. _Hah, like that could have happened. More important things ahead for you and me yet, Beckett._

Later, he asked her out to dinner. She didn't say no, exactly, but it certainly wasn't a yes.

"It's too bad. It would've been great." He gave her a wry smile. She leaned towards him and whispered in his ear.

"You have no idea."

She turned and walked away from him, and it was all he could do to not openly gawp.

_I think there might be more to this whole guardian angel thing than I originally thought._

* * *

A/N: So, hi. As you can tell, this is an AU! I'm not really sure how this is going to pan out, but I expect there to be a good mileage in it. I will try to update it regularly, at least once a week, I guess. Hope you enjoy it!


	2. Chapter 2

_We have to stop doing this. _It felt like he told himself that every time she came back to the city. _If only so I don't have to pay for having my pictures re-framed and my bed repaired._

Meredith panted, "Top ten, at least." Castle wasn't so sure, but let her carry on. "Makes you wonder why we ever got divorced."

He mentally eye-rolled. "I know, right? I mean, except for you having an affair with your director and moving to Malibu and serving me with divorce papers, I think we really had a chance."

"I'm moving back." _What?! _

"To New York?" _No, no no no! _

"I miss it. I miss Alexis. I miss you." _This cannot be happening!_

"Um, what about your career?" _Please, no!_

"Oh, LA's changed. The juicy roles just aren't there for an actress of my calibre. I need a change. Like Broadway, maybe. The legitimate stage."

His eyes widened, "Whoa. Wow. Time-out. Hang on. Meredith, hold on. Have you really thought this through?"

"What's to think about? You, me, Alexis, all living in the same city. It's gonna be just like old times." _No! No it won't! It can't be! _She started to kiss her way down his broad chest and he just pressed his palm to his forehead in an attempt to quell the growing terror. _Oh help._

* * *

As her mother ushered her out of the vice principal's office, sniffing into her handkerchief, Alexis whispered to her, "Uh, Mom, Grandpa died six years ago."

"I know, but a death in the family? Always a good excuse to get out of school." Alexis was horrified, but Meredith talked her round with the promise of shopping and lunch that wasn't in Paris. Because they all knew how well that had gone last time.

* * *

Castle read aloud from his desk to an increasingly frustrated-looking Beckett. _Can't say I blame her, really, I mean, she's in my office listening to me reading from..._

"'Unholy Storm'? You dragged me here so that you could read from your own book?" She almost exploded.

Castle looked more upset than he really was, "Hey, there's a lot of good stuff in here, and some of it is factual."

Beckett got up with an exaggerated roll of her eyes, eliciting a little burst of panic from Castle. "Where are you going?"

She answered without turning around as she made her way to the front door, "I have a murder to solve."

_That's what we're doing! _"I thought that's what we were doing. Okay, I... I'm just kidding. I have another source."

"And you call your ex-wife 'a deep-fried Twinkie.'" _I wonder if she knows I can hear her raising her eyebrow without even seeing her face._

"Oh, trust me. As annoying and intrusive as you think I am, she's a million times worse."

Beckett frowned, "What about Alexis? Maybe she misses her mom. Maybe it would be a good idea to have her back in town." Castle just scoffed.

"Yeah, right. This once, when Alexis was nine, Meredith dropped by to take her out to lunch."

"So?"

With a pause for dramatic effect, Castle replied, "In Paris. Paris!" _Paris, for crying out loud! It's not exactly a quick trip!_ "And then she acted like there was nothing wrong. She's like Auntie Mame on meth."

As she reached the front door, Beckett finally turned on her heel to look at him. "If she's so bad, then why'd you sleep with her this morning?"

_Oh, Detective, please let that be a little hint of jealousy I spy in your demeanour... _"Let me tell you something about crazy people." He lowered his voice to a hushed whisper to share his secret, "The sex is unbelievable."

He could almost hear her internal disgust, "How shallow are you?"

Castle smirked, "Very." He deflated a little inside. _I'm not really, Beckett, I just have to go with this for a while longer...  
_

There was a knock on the door, and he opened it with a genuine smile. "Detective Beckett, meet my other source..."

* * *

Later, Castle perched on the end of Beckett's desk and discussed the case with Ryan and Esposito while they all stared at the murder board looking for inspiration. A familiar voice drifted across the bullpen.

"No, I am not going to wait downstairs. Do you have any idea who pays your salary? Me and my taxes." Castle shut his eyes as the terror from earlier threatened to take over once more. _Ugh, can she just go away? Please? _He didn't catch Beckett's confused glance at him, but he did hear her question.

"Is that...?"

Castle sighed and opened his eyes again. "Yep." His first ex-wife was laden with shopping bags, almost shielding his beyond-embarrassed daughter from view, and picking a fight with one of the uniformed officers until she spotted him and waved.

"Richard! Over here!"

Esposito could hardly tear his eyes away from the spectacle to speak, "Deep-fried Twinkie?"

Another sigh escaped Castle's lungs, "Afraid so."

Beckett nodded to the uni to let them through so the bullpen could return to pretending to work while actually watching the show.

Castle didn't even try to sound sincere, "Meredith, what a surprise." _Why are you here._

"I know, isn't it great?" _Not really, no. _She turned to Beckett with a wide smile, "In LA, no one ever just stops by. Don't you just love this town?"

Beckett could hardly contain her amusement. "More and more by the minute," she replied.

_I guess there's no avoiding this now... _"Uh, Meredith, these are Detectives Ryan, Esposito, and Detective Beckett."

Meredith's smile grew wider, "Oh, Beckett. Your new muse. Alexis told me all about it..." Alexis' eyes grew wide with horror and she gaped at her mother before giving her father the same look. He blinked sympathetically. _I know, pumpkin, I know. _"...and I simply had to stop by." Meredith lowered her voice, "You know, I was his 'inspiration' once." If it were possible, Alexis looked even more horrified as the conversation continued.

"Were you, now?" Beckett toed the line between politely interested and incredibly amused with those expressive eyebrows.

"Still am from time to time." Meredith turned to Castle and tilted her head in a way she probably thought was cute, "Right, kitten?" Beckett crossed over the line and tried not to smile too widely at Castle's squirming.

"Kitten?" She tilted her head to mimic Meredith.

_Argh._ He looked sincerely at Beckett as she sauntered past him, "I had this dream once, only I was naked and far less embarrassed."

* * *

"Come on, Pumpkin, let's get you home." Castle extended his hand to Alexis to pull her off the sofa in the break room. Meredith had deigned it easier to leave her daughter here instead of taking her home herself. _Not that I mind a bit of extra daddy-daughter time._ He grabbed her bag and nudged her out of the door.

"Bye Alexis! See you tomorrow, Castle." Ryan called over the bullpen to them, and Castle waved in reply as they walked into the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, Alexis took a deep breath and turned to her father.

"Dad, about what Mom said about Detective Beckett... I swear, I didn't tell her anything! I just said you were shadowing her, she made the rest up, and-"

"It's okay, Alexis, don't worry." He put his arm over her shoulder for a hug. "I don't think Detective Beckett was upset about what she insinuated, and I'm not upset about it either. So you certainly shouldn't be." _Oh Meredith... why do you do this to your own daughter?_

Alexis returned the hug, her reply muffled by Castle's jacket, "Thanks, Dad."

The elevator dinged and the doors opened to the lobby of the precinct building. "So, when we get home, is it laser tag, or ice cream?" _Ooh, say both, both would be great._

Alexis looked contemplative for a moment and then grinned, "...both?" Castle grinned right back at her and fist-pumped into the air.

"Yesss!"

* * *

Beckett got her phone out and called dispatch for back-up. The next thing Castle knew, he was tackling her to the floor while the suspect shot at them and Beckett was shouting to the woman who had unwittingly bought the purse with the concealed passport to call 911. Vases were shattering all around them from Baylor's wayward gunshots while they used the sofa as cover to crawl around to behind the kitchen island. They paused and took stock of the situation.

"I've written this scene about a hundred times. We give him what he wants, you know how it ends? Badly. And by 'badly' I mean us dead."

"Just stay down."

_Pfft, like I can do that if you don't. _"You stay down."

"I can't shoot him from down here!"

"Yeah, he can't shoot you, either."

A cautious peek over the kitchen counter was rewarded by another shot in their direction. "I can't see him."

_Oh, wait! That's it!_ Castle got his phone out, called up the app he wanted, and stuck his hand up to take a photo of the room. That earned another couple of shots, but it gave Beckett the visual she needed.

"I don't have an angle on him from down here."

Baylor shouted out, "I will kill you both!" _Helpful, thanks. Come on, Rick, think..._

"When we shoot, he shoots, right?" Beckett nodded, uncertain of where Castle was going with this particular train of thought. "He'll be exposed. I'll set the pick, you take him down."

"Set the pick with what?" Castle pulled a bottle of bubbly out of the wine rack in front of him and started to take off the foil and wire around the cork. Beckett could hardly believe the plan she began to see unfolding in front of her. "You're gonna get yourself shot."

"Not if you make your shot count."

"Castle!"

"Just be ready." _You can do this, Beckett. I hope to God you can do this._ He gave the bottle a good shake.

The suspect shouted again, "This is your last warning!"

"Now!" As Castle popped the cork from the champagne, Beckett popped up from behind the counter and shot Baylor with her last two bullets. "Huh." _That actually worked. Awesome!_ "I'd say that calls for a toast." He took a long gulp of the champagne while Beckett concentrated on getting Baylor handcuffed.

* * *

Castle found a glass and poured the champagne out. _Might as well be civilized about it._ He took his drink out into the hall to keep out of the way of the paramedics, and that's where Beckett found him, leaning nonchalantly against the wall with a smile on his lips.

"You okay, Castle?"

_Are you kidding me?! _"My first gun battle." _It was awesome!_

"Your last gun battle," Beckett replied, with a twitch of an eyebrow. _That's what you think, Detective._

"Hmm, don't be so pessimistic. I think I handled myself pretty well."

"Yeah. Probably saved my life." _Damn right I did._

"'Probably'? I definitely saved your life. And you know what that means, don't you? It means you owe me."

"Owe you what?" Confusion fluttered across her forehead. _Like a butterfly's shadow... oh what the hell, Rick, shut up._

"Whatever I want." Castle nudged himself off the wall and moved slowly towards Beckett. _Hopefully I'm mostly staying in a straight line, this champagne has gone to my head quicker than I thought it would, I mean, come on, making up poetry about how she frowns? For crying out loud... Uh, where was I? Oh, right._ "And you know... exactly... what I want, don't you? You know what I really, really, want you to do." Beckett looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights and it was all he could do to keep his poker face on as he leaned towards her face, altering his course at the last second to whisper in her ear, "Never... ever... call me kitten."

With that he turned on his heel and walked away, leaving Beckett to smile indulgently at his back. _Please let her take that seriously and not adopt Meredith's nickname for me._ It was bad enough that his first ex-wife still called him it, without having to hear it from Beckett too.

* * *

_Phew._ He shut the door on Meredith with a sigh of relief. _Next time will not be top ten. There will be no next time._ Castle explained to Martha and Alexis about the indie film Meredith had been offered a role in, and how he'd basically funded it in order to get her to stay in LA. Not one of his prouder moments, but preserving his daughter's sanity was more important than getting worked up about going behind his ex-wife's back. After a quick hug from Alexis, he went into his office to 'do some work', shutting the door quietly after him. He opened the middle drawer of his desk and moved some papers around to get to a small box, which he carefully lifted out. He opened the box and removed the small piece of parchment to re-read the words sent by... _what, a divine messenger? _He frowned. _What if this is actually just some trick of Mother's? Or my own mind. Maybe this is what madness feels like. _As looked at the parchment, the words faded and were replaced with the same beautifully perfect cursive.

"_It won't be your last gun fight. The better prepared you are, the better you can protect her."_

_Huh. Mother never said anything about her scroll changing. _He looked out of the window across the rooftops before putting the parchment away again. With a sense of purpose, he woke his laptop up to start searching for kevlar vests.

* * *

A/N: ohi. This week I have learned how awesome fic writers who post a different story update every day are. Wow, you guys, huge respect for the amount of work you do! This one chapter has taken me all week, and it seems huge compared to the last one, I kept thinking I'd finished, then I'd think of something else I should put in!

I'd like to thank lika-mikala on livejournal for her transcribing of Castle episodes (posted on _scriptline dot livejournal dot com_), without which I would be re-watching the episodes again just to get the dialogue right. I'm trying to get away from sticking to the script, but I need to intersect with canon so often it's proving difficult. Any tips on that gratefully received. Anyhow, see you next week!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I don't know about you, but I have (what feels like) hundreds of stories on alert, and sometimes it's difficult to remember which one's which when you open four or five at once as I tend to, so here's a quick recap:

_Last week, Castle saved Beckett with a bottle of champagne and started crafting drunken poetry about her frown. The text on his scroll changed itself to reveal a new message, which confused him, but he took the hint and started looking online for bullet-proof vests. _

* * *

_Wow, I hope the little girl's parents don't walk in here to get an eyeful of this._ Castle cleared his throat and plastered a smirk across his face. "Relations between the NYPD and the FBI have reached an all-time high, I see."

Beckett hardly knew where to look and Sorensen seemed to be throwing invisible ninja stars at Castle's head with his eyes. She began to stammer out some kind of explanation, but Castle interrupted, "You're both consenting adults, who you kiss and where has nothing to do with me..." _Though I wish you wouldn't do it here, in front of me, it's like an exquisite torture, Beckett, you kissing some other guy... where the hell did that come from?! Shut up, Rick, shut-up-shut- up-shut-up._ "Here, I brought you a coffee."

Beckett's blush began to fade, but she still looked sheepish as she took the coffee cup with a quiet smile. "Thanks, Castle." He smiled in reply.

"So how's it going here?" He took a sip of his own coffee and looked through the kitchen doorway into the main living area of the apartment where the parents of the abducted child were huddled on the sofa.

"Not great, actually." Beckett looked at Castle and from the corner of his eye he could see she was beginning to observe him the way he observed her. Try as he might, he couldn't hide the sympathetic worry that had settled on his shoulders and onto his forehead. She turned to Sorensen, "Let's leave the tech guys to get set up, go back to the precinct and see what Ryan and Esposito have for us." Sorensen nodded and left the room without a word, leaving the writer with his muse. "Castle?" _I just don't understand why their little girl's been taken. And they're just sitting there not doing anything. If it was Alexis, I..._ "Castle." He looked at Beckett, she gave him a soft smile, "Come on."

* * *

"I need you to go home." _What?! No, come on Beckett, this isn't fair._ _And did you have to do this in the middle of the bullpen? _

"No. There must be something I can do here to help."

"Castle! Go. Home." _Seriously? Oh, she is really serious._ He let out a long sigh.

"Fine." Castle stepped into her personal space, and just as she tried to step backwards he lowered his voice so only she could hear, "But if you need me, call me. Even if it's just to talk." _Tell me you need me, Beckett._ "Okay?"

She nodded slightly and replied with a quiet, "Okay," so he picked up his coat and strode out of the bullpen and into the elevator without looking back.

* * *

Two yellow cabs pulled up at the corner of Broome and Crosby. Castle laughed as he hopped out of the foremost car, "Hey Pumpkin!" Alexis waved back at him. "Did you have enough money?" He hadn't put his wallet back in his pocket yet.

"Yeah, Dad, I paid," she linked arms with him and they walked into the building together.

"How was school?" Alexis started to tell him about her classes and what she and her friends had got up to over the day. He tried to keep an interested smile on his face but it had become strained by the time they got into the loft. _What if that family don't get to do this in ten years' time? That poor little girl, she must be so scared._

"Dad, what's wrong?" _Hmm?_ He looked up at Alexis who'd already made it into the kitchen while he was still stood by the door fiddling with his coat. "I just told you I'm pregnant, and got nothing. So what's going on?"

He walked over to her, put his coat over the back of one of the stools and sat down with a heavy sigh. "It's the case." Alexis turned from concerned to resigned in the mere shift of weight from one foot to the other. She placed her hands on the countertop and waited. _She knows there's a story. There's always a story._ "A little girl was kidnapped."

"Oh no..." Castle looked so dejected, she moved around the kitchen island to give her dad a hug. "Why is Beckett on the case if it's not a murder investigation?" Castle sighed again. _Guess I might as well tell her all of it._

"Well, the FBI are in charge, but Beckett's assistance was requested by the guy leading the case." _He's so slimy._ "He's a complete slimeball, and to make it worse he's Beckett's ex-boyfriend."

"Her ex-boyfriend?!" _I know, right?_ His eyebrow tilted up slightly. "Sounds a bit... intimate."

"Yeah. And apparently they worked a child kidnapping case before, except it didn't have a happy ending." Alexis dropped her forehead to Castle's shoulder. "So she sent me home early."

"She did?" He nodded and stroked his daughter's hair. "I'm glad."

"Me too, Pumpkin." _Me too. But that poor little girl, with nothing to comfort her... _"Alexis, where's Monkey Bunkey?" She looked up at him.

"He's upstairs in my room, on the shelf. Why?" He shrugged.

"Just had an idea. Might be nothing." _I'll come back to that thought later._ "What d'you want for dinner?"

"Spaghetti please!" They both smiled, and Castle got up and started to cook.

* * *

"Hey guys, help yourselves," Castle appeared around midnight with enough coffee and sugary treats to placate a dozen tired cops and feds. While the gannets descended, he disappeared towards the other side of the apartment where the little girl's bedroom was, and carefully pushed the door open.

_I knew this pocket LED torch would come in useful some day. _He moved towards the bed and started hunting around on his knees. _It must be here somewhere..._

"Castle...?"

_Is that..._ "Beckett?" He straightened up and moved his torch in the direction of her voice, the beam of light shining directly in her eyes before he quickly diverted it. "Oh, sorry. What're you doing here?"

She sat up a little, her jacket dropping down from its precarious perch over her front, and groggily replied, "I could ask you the same question."

_Hmm, fair point._ "Well..." He told her about Alexis and Monkey Bunkey and how inseparable they'd always been, and how he'd seen that in the photographs of the little girl she always had the same stuffed animal with her. _Kinda wish it wasn't so dark so that I could see your face, Beckett, I know you go all mushy when I talk about Alexis. I should thank that kid for being such a great icebreaker someday. _

"Let's go find that rabbit, so we can find Angela."

* * *

"Actually, sir, it was Castle's insight that turned the case around." _Woah, woah, wait. Did Kate Beckett just compliment me? _She turned her head to give him a small smile. _Holy crap, she did! _Castle puffed his chest out proudly and tried (and failed) not to grin too much. Roy clapped him on the shoulder and smiled at Beckett as he returned to his office. Beckett narrowed her eyes and looked at Castle, her smile growing a little. "You gonna do the paperwork, then?"

_Yeah, right._ "Actually, I need to get home so I can tell Alexis the good news," he grinned smugly at her eye-roll. "Besides, if I wrote the reports, you'd only have to check them over to make sure I didn't put any aliens or zombies in to make them more interesting." That quip earned him a sharp laugh she couldn't quite hold in. _Hah, I'm on a roll today._ "Until tomorrow, Detective."

"See you, Castle."

When the elevator doors shut, he let the mask of his smile slip away and leaned back against the cold metal. _I don't know how much longer I can keep from telling her about her mom._ He shut his eyes and took a deep breath. _But if I tell her, she'll kick me out and how will I keep to the scroll? _The elevator pinged before the sob of desperation that threatened to escape his chest could get the better of him. _I can't tell her. I just can't. She needs me... and I need her._ He stepped out into the afternoon light with a grim determination set into his face.

* * *

He sat at his desk staring at the front cover of the closed file. Time passed around him, the sun moved behind the tall buildings to throw long shadows into the office. Martha leaned against the door frame and watched him for a few minutes. He didn't move, barely even blinked, his shoulders sagging, his chest rising and falling with only shallow breaths as if he had become immobilised by the thoughts spinning around his head. Except there weren't any thoughts spinning around. He'd given up trying to think and let his mind go completely blank, in the hope the file might provide some inspiration by the power of osmosis. _Or something._

"You should tell her."

He didn't look up, didn't even acknowledge his mother's presence. He wasn't ready to have this conversation with anyone other than himself. And he wasn't sure he was ready to even do that.

"Richard..."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out on a slow exhale. Martha released the breath she didn't realise she was holding in. _Mother, please..._

"Richard." The tone in her voice made him snap his eyes open and he looked straight at her. "When are you going to take responsibility for your actions? You shouldn't have looked at her mother's file, but you did. You shouldn't have given the file to your doctor friend to look at, but you did. You shouldn't have started meddling in the poor woman's life. But you did." She fixed him with a cold glare and he swallowed nervously. "You have to tell her."

"She'll never talk to me again."

"You should have thought about that before you started digging."

"Mother..."

"No, Richard. You will face the music." He looked back down at the file and rested his hands on either side of it. He nodded, almost imperceptibly. "Good." Martha pushed off from the door frame and walked to his side so she could place her hand on his shoulder and kiss his hair before she made to leave the office.

He spoke up as she passed through the door, "What about the scroll?" She turned.

"What about it?"

_Yeah, Rick, what about it?_ He opened his desk drawer and got the scroll out from its hiding place. The words had changed since he had last looked and his eyes widened as he read them. Martha came over to read with him, a confused frown on her face.

"It's changed..." He nodded.

"This isn't the first time it's changed." They shared a loaded glance before looking back at the scroll to re-read it.

"_Take the chance while you still have the choice."_

* * *

A/N: Happy birthday to me! See you next week :)


	4. Chapter 4

_Recap: A little girl was kidnapped and Castle's theory solved the case. Following Martha's advice, he decided he had to tell Beckett about the new evidence he'd found out about her mother's murder._

* * *

"It's about your mother." Beckett took a step back, her calves bumping on the waiting room chairs. _This is it. Four words and she's already trying to get away from me._ Castle glanced at his feet and began to speak, "I've found some new evidence." He looked up again to see Beckett wide-eyed and shaking her head, not wanting to believe the words coming out of his mouth. "Beckett, listen..."

"No." Castle stopped in his tracks as she firmly repeated herself. "No. I told you not to look at her file, but you did anyway." He opened his mouth to defend himself. "No. Leave, Castle. We're done. I don't want to see you again."

Castle hung his head, studying the flecks in the hospital floor tiles. He saw Beckett's feet move away from him and he lifted his eyes just enough to see her walk out the door. _Shit. That was worse than I expected it to be._ He felt his knees begin to give way and he reached out to the chairs to catch himself and he sat down carefully. _I didn't even get to tell her anything about it._

He stood up and began to slowly walk away from the offending place where he'd just lost his battle to stay before it had really begun. He squinted as he emerged into the sunlight. _I guess coming to the hospital when she's visiting Sorensen wasn't a great idea. The slimeball had to get himself shot didn't he, appeal to her sympathetic side._ He kicked at a can on the sidewalk and took a stuttering breath before hailing a cab.

* * *

The next few days carried on in a productive, if unsatisfying, pattern. Scotch played a large role, as did Castle's laptop and Nikki Heat. The bags under his eyes grew darker but the word count grew higher and by the end of the week he had finally finished Heat Wave. _The first, and only, book about Nikki Heat_. As he looked over the last chapter, he didn't know whether to laugh or cry. If Alexis hadn't walked into his study as the first sob threatened to claw its way out of his chest, it would have probably been the latter.

"Hey Dad." She gave him a small smile as she rounded his desk and leaned against the edge of it.

"Hey Pumpkin." His voice was strained and gravelly from too much scotch and not enough interaction with non-fictional humans.

"You need a break," Alexis stated. There would be no questioning it. He nodded. "It's Friday today, in case you'd lost track. I'm going to go to school and when I get back let's go to the Hamptons for the weekend."

Castle smiled, for what felt like the first time all week. "Great idea, Alexis." She smiled back and kissed his cheek.

"So now you need to go to bed and sleep off that alcohol so you can drive later. There's leftovers from last night's dinner in the fridge too."

He frowned, "There was dinner last night?"

Alexis stood up from the desk with a sigh and roll of her eyes, "Yes, there was. I did tell you, multiple times. You didn't emerge from here though, so I left you to it. I guess you were near the end." Castle cradled his head in his hands and his reply was muffled slightly.

"Yeah. Finished it. I'll print it off for you to read over the weekend." He yawned, and she was already halfway to the front door.

Her voice wafted through the loft, "Okay, see you later Dad!" Castle put his head down on his desk and slept.

* * *

_What is that? Some kind of giant rhythmic bee? Right by my head, argh, get away from me! _He swatted to the left of his head, causing papers to fly everywhere, along with his phone. _Oh good, the bee has gone._ The loft telephone started to ring, and Castle sat up quickly. _Ow, fuck, my neck, euw drool everywhere. Oh, the phone._ He reached over to pick the phone up.

"Castle," he answered groggily, wiping his chin with the back of his hand.

"Oh, you're there. I was beginning to wonder if you'd died." _Oh great._

"Hello Gina. To what do I owe the pleasure of your scintillating conversation?" _Ugh my mouth is so furry. Why has my ex-wife called? Can't she leave me alone?_

"I was hoping you'd be able to tell me why you haven't given me your manuscript yet. You remember how it works, you write it, I publish it."

_Oh right, of course, she's my publisher. How could I ever forget? _"Yes, I am aware of how the publishing world works." He got up and walked through his bedroom into the bathroom, picked up the toothpaste and his electric toothbrush and began to brush his teeth.

"So...?"

"So, wha'?"

"Richard, are you brushing your teeth while you're on the phone with me?" He moved the phone so the receiver could really pick up the noise of the toothbrush.

"Yeff." There was an exasperated noise at the other end of the line.

"For God's sake, Richard! Have you, or have you not finished the book."

"Yeff."

"Yes, you've finished it, or yes you have not finished it?!"

"The firff one."

_Huh, that shut her up. _He finished up at the sink before continuing.

"I'm just checking through the last couple of chapters, and I'll send it over on Monday."

"Monday? Why not today?"

"Because I'm going to take Alexis away for the weekend." He moved back to the bedroom and into the closet. "She wants to get out of the city for a couple of days." _And so do I. _He picked out some clean clothes and a bag and cradled the phone against his shoulder so he could pack.

"Well, alright then." _Thank you for giving your permission, oh great monitor of my life._ "Don't forget on Monday though."

"Yes, Gina. Thank you, Gina. I'll speak to you next week, Gina." He could hear the frustration at him practically oozing out of her.

"There's no need to be sarcastic with me, Richard. I'll call you on Monday." She hung up and his stomach growled. _Hmm, wonder what those leftovers are._

* * *

Castle lay spreadeagled on the beach with only a pair of shorts and a layer of suncream to protect him against the baking hot sun. He began to snore and Alexis, who was sensibly sitting under a parasol as she read his first draft manuscript, took that as her cue to get him to roll over, so at least he'd be evenly pink all over.

"Dad." The snoring continued. "Dad!" He snorted, _What? Huh?_

"Yes?"

"Roll over so you can be lobster-coloured on both sides."

"But lobsters are blue."

"Not when they're cooked, and you're roasting."

"Ha ha, very funny," he replied mockingly, as he rolled over on the blanket. "Besides, I haven't turned pink."

"Oooh, just you wait until you see your face in a mirror..."

* * *

He zoned back into the conference call he was obliged to be listening to, as his publicist's voice rattled on, "So, Cosmo want to interview you for the new book, seeing as it's a female character. They want to do it at the police station, so I've spoken to the guy in charge there, what's his name? Montgomery? Whatever, he says it's fine, so I've put it into your diary."

Castle blinked. _A magazine wants me to go do an interview for them at the precinct? And I'm supposed to talk about Kate when she's right there?_

"They wanna talk to the detective too."

"Woah, Paula, hang on a second. Beckett's not even talking to me at the moment, so how the hell do you think she's going to like this little stunt?"

"You say it like she has a choice in the matter, Ricky."

He sighed and shut his eyes. "Okay. But I'm not happy about it."

"You don't have to be happy about it, but you do have to be nice to the reporter. And the photographer. And the models."

He groaned and laid his forehead on his desk. _Oh God, why..._

* * *

The photoshoot, as predicted, had been atrocious. Not that it was difficult standing and making stupid faces for a photographer, but doing that with those two models feeling him up, and knowing Beckett was watching with her 'I'm-judging-you-Castle' glare on? It was just too much. _At least she let me stay for the case._ He rubbed his forehead to soothe the burgeoning headache, and decided to check the scroll.

He listened for the telltale sounds of movement in the loft before cautiously opening the drawer and lifting the box from within. He unlocked the box and peeked inside. _Still there._ He picked the scroll out with slightly trembling fingers. _Please let there be a new message. _

There was no new message. But it had changed from when he'd last looked at it. Now it was blank. Castle frowned, but at the sound of the front door slamming shut the frown turned to surprise. He tried to hide the scroll away but Alexis was already halfway across the office before he could shut the box.

She stood like a statue in the middle of the room, her half-formed sentence dying on her lips before she knew what the end of it would be. "Dad, are-...?"

Rick looked sheepishly up at his daughter, "How was your date, Alexis?" Her eyes flicked from the box up to meet his and then returned to the box.

"What's that?"

_Well, shit._ "I... um..." He took a deep breath, "Alexis, it's not something I ever thought I'd have to tell you about, so I'm not really sure how to explain."

"Dad, you're scaring me. Just show me it, whatever it is." _No, it won't make any sense!_

"I... Alexis..."

"No, Dad. Show me." The force in her voice made him blink. "Please." He looked back down at the box and nodded.

"Okay."

Alexis moved round to stand next to him behind his desk as he opened the box again.

"It's a scroll. It... appeared... last year. The night of the 'Storm Fall' launch party." Alexis reverently picked it out of the box and unfurled it, while Castle fiddled with the silk ribbon.

"It's blank." He nodded.

"It wasn't when it appeared."

"So, you're saying there are usually words on it?" He nodded again. "And these words are... what, exactly?"

"Messages. From God."

Alexis dropped all pretence of belief, her tone indignant, "Dad, seriously? Messages from God."

"Yes," he whispered, watching the scroll. Alexis gasped as the scroll began to sparkle, golden twinkles and stars floating around it. "And the main point of them is that... I'm Beckett's guardian angel."

"You're... her guardian angel...?" Rick watched Alexis carefully, while she hadn't been able to tear her eyes away from the scroll. _Is she taking this in? Or does she think I'm joking... _"Dad, Dad! Look, there are words forming!" _Wait, words?!_

He jumped up and looked over her shoulder at the scroll, eagerly awaiting the message.

"_Alexis has the answer."_

"That's... short."

"They usually are. I guess God doesn't have time to waste on explaining things."

"What do I have the answer to?" Rick looked at the words once more then looked up at his daughter before enveloping her in a hug.

"I don't know. Let's not worry about it. Maybe if we gaze into the fridge it will tell us." She nodded against his chest and carefully put the scroll into its box. "Tell me about your date with Owen."

They wandered into the kitchen, arm in arm. "Ugh, what date? He stood me up! And he didn't even apologise! Why can't boys ever just say they're sorry, why do they have to make up a reason for everything?" She opened the fridge but Castle had stopped a few steps behind, rooted in place.

_That's it. _"That's it! You have the answer!" Alexis turned and looked at her dad with confusion all over her face.

"The answer to what?"

"I'll tell you when I get back." He rushed to kiss her forehead, then ran out of the loft. _Got to apologise to Beckett, before it's too late. Please let this work, this has to work, please let Alexis be right._

* * *

He tried to walk purposefully into the precinct but he was so nervous he nearly tripped on the floorboards. _Get it together, Rick, for crying out loud._ But he saw Beckett at her desk and the nerves disappeared. The words were on the tip of his tongue, ready to be presented and spoken and offered up to her in a way he'd never thought words would or could be given to anyone.

He apologised. ___I've apologised, dammit_, why isn't she acknowledging me? He hung his head and walked away.

"Castle?" He stopped and turned to face her. "See you tomorrow."

Alexis was right.

* * *

A/N: This week's chapter was being reclusive, and I wrote a whole other fic in the meantime (it's called _Cooking Up A Storm_, it's fluffy and fun, and has food in it), but I've managed to get it done :) hope you like it. See you next week!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I took a week off, sorry for not telling you in advance. I didn't mean to, but I had a bit of a dilemma about what I was doing with the story and where it's headed and how it's going to get there, so I figured I should take some time to decide and actually set down a plan. Which I've now done. So let's get to it.

_Recap: Beckett told Castle they're done. But they're not done. Not by a longshot. And Alexis found out about the scroll. There were golden twinkling stars and everything._

* * *

Everything moved in slow motion. The muzzle of the gun in his back, Coonan's tight grip around his arm, Beckett's stiff movements alongside them as they walk through the bullpen. He took his cues from her, watching her out of the corner of his eye. _There has to be a way out of this. I can practically feel Beckett thinking. Come on, Beckett, you can do this, come o-..._

Roy Montgomery stepped out in front of the trio and Castle felt his peripheral vision darken until he could barely focus on the man in front of him. Beckett was speaking, quiet and low, but he had no idea what she was saying. All he could hear was his own blood rushing through his ear drums, throbbing loud and fast. He felt his captor's hand release slightly and he reacted on some deep-seated ancestral level, whipping his head back to crack Coonan's nose. _Ow, shit, that, ow, hurts, fuck._ He grabbed the back of his head as he leaned against the wall, but suddenly two gunshots pierced his sound-world and he turned to see Beckett rush towards Coonan who was crumpling to the floor, blood flowing from his chest, hot and slick.

Castle watched her start chest compressions. _No, Beckett... no... _His heart was breaking for her, so desperate to know the answers from her mother's killer that she was trying to save the life of someone who had been about to shoot her. As he processed what had happened, he realised that Coonan hadn't been aiming at Beckett at all, _he was aiming at me... oh God, what have I done?_ He swallowed hard and forced himself back to the present, placing his hand gently on Beckett's shoulder.

_It's done, Beckett. You need to stop. Please, Kate... please..._

* * *

_I can't do this anymore. I can't do this anymore. I can't do this anymore._

He repeated the mantra to himself as he visited multiple restaurants to pick up bags full of take-out. Something Italian, something Chinese, something Mexican, something Thai, even fish and chips. Anything she could possibly want, he got. All because he couldn't do this anymore.

_Damn, I should've gone to the loft and looked at the scroll. Oh well, too late now. The food would get cold. _Castle rode the elevator to the fourth floor of the precinct, trying to steel his resolve even as he walked across the bullpen to Beckett's desk. He was convinced this was the right thing to do, just up and walk away from the best thing that had ever happened to him, because it was all his fault. And he didn't think there was a way to fix it.

So it was time for the last supper.

Beckett looked up from the paperwork she was reading and smiled at him. His resolve began to falter. "Hey Castle."

He tried to smile back, "Whatcha reading?"

"Montgomery's report." She looked down at the form in front of her again. "You come off as Steven Seagal, total action hero." Castle shifted nervously on his feet and rubbed the back of his head with a wince.

"I can't tell if that's a good thing or a bad thing." Beckett laughed, and noticed he was still standing. She frowned a little and was about to ask him to sit when he began to speak again. "Beckett, I can't do this anymore. I... what happened today, it's all my fault. It was me that went digging at your mom's case, it was me that Coonan grabbed, me that caused the distraction. If I wasn't here, none of it would've happened and you'd still have a suspect." He took a heavy breath and looked at her imploringly, "I'm sorry, Beckett. I'm so sorry."

Beckett regarded him for a moment before laying the paperwork she was holding down on the desk, "Castle, sit down." He sighed and carefully sat in his chair, bags in hand still, and she waited for him to raise his eyes to hers once more before she continued. "You have nothing to apologize for. Nothing. Today was tough. But if it happened over in exactly the same way, I wouldn't hesitate to shoot him again if he was aiming at you." Castle's eyebrows twitched in surprise, and Beckett smiled a little as she leaned towards him conspiratorially, "If you tell anyone what I'm about to say, there's going to be another shooting, but…I've gotten used to you pulling my pigtails. I have a hard job, Castle, and having you around makes it a little more fun."

_Huh. _

He smiled, for what felt like the first time all day. "Your secret's safe with me." She beamed back at him, _wow, what a smile..._

"What's in the bags, anyway?"

He blinked his meandering thoughts aside and started placing the bags onto her desk. "I didn't know what you wanted to eat, so... I, uh, brought everything."

"Everything?"

"Yeah," he shrugged. "Pretty much."

* * *

As Castle took their empty cartons to the trash can in the break room, Beckett tidied up the leftovers and her paperwork. Suddenly, golden stars began to twinkle on her desk, and her eyes widened as a scroll, immaculately tied with a thin blue ribbon, appeared in front of her. She glanced up in the direction of the break room and saw that Castle wasn't looking through the window, so she picked up her purse and put it on her desk to block his view. She stared back down at the scroll and reached out to touch it.

"Hey Beckett, d'you want to take those leftovers home, or are you going to leave them in the fridge here?" Castle sauntered back to her desk to pick up the rest of the cartons and saw her hurriedly packing her bag. She looked up and shrugged.

"Leave it here, I guess. The boys might want breakfast." He laughed and shrugged in return. _I wonder what she was in such a rush to hide away in her purse..._

As Castle shut the door of the fridge he heard the elevator ding. He came out of the break room just as Beckett rushed into the elevator. She looked at him over her shoulder and smiled, "Thanks for dinner, Castle."

"Yeah. Uh, no problem." _Kate Beckett leaving the precinct before me? What the hell?_ "See you tomorrow?"

She had to shout through the closing doors, "See you tomorrow!"

_And I didn't even get to ask her if she wanted to go for a drink._

* * *

A/N: Back next week :)


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: This chapter will include snippets from Kate's perspective, for a change, and we'll see her inner thoughts in the same way as we've previously seen Castle's.

_Recap: Beckett shot Coonan in the precinct to stop him from killing Castle. In a twist that took even your writer by surprise Beckett became the cautious recipient of a scroll of her own._

* * *

Beckett couldn't even wait to get her coat and shoes off when she got back to her apartment. She flipped the lock on the door and went straight to the kitchen counter where she dumped her purse and reached inside. She took out the scroll, which continued to glow faintly, and placed it gently down on the counter top. Her head tilted to the side as she stared at it. The very existence of the object offended her belief that things like magic and fate were total fantasy, and yet here it was, in her kitchen, having materialised in front of her very own eyes on her desk at the precinct.

She moved around the kitchen, circling the scroll as if it were a suspect in the box, that she would be able to interrogate and draw a confession from. But it sat there impassively, almost taunting her with its secret. Of course, she was curious. Who wouldn't be? _The old Beckett wouldn't be,_ she thought to herself.

With a huff, she turned her back on it and went about pouring herself a glass of wine. _This is all Castle's fault, the way he goes on about magic and all that crap. _She looked over her shoulder and eyed the scroll again. _Still there. _She rolled her eyes. _Ugh! Ridiculous!_

Kate walked across the kitchen and set down her glass purposefully. She placed her hands flat on the counter top and narrowed her eyes at the scroll. _Alright then, let's see what this is shall we?_ She lifted her right hand and reached for the end of the thin blue ribbon, feeling its silkiness between her thumb and finger. Then she slowly pulled on it, allowing the scroll to unfurl until it laid itself flat on the surface in a way that could only be described as unnatural for something which had been curled for at least an hour.

She didn't have time to dwell on the magical properties of the material, however, as she read the message that was written in immaculate cursive.

"_Give the man an inch and he'll take a mile; kick him when he's down and he'll get back up to stand his ground; show him a sliver of light through a crack in the wall and he'll chip away at it until he's bathed in sunlight."_

Kate blinked, then tilted her head to the side in confusion. _What the..._

* * *

_Brains..._

Below the sharp sound of butter being scraped onto toast, Alexis heard a groaning and shuffling noise. She looked up from her breakfast and saw her dad ambling zombie-like towards her in his pyjamas and dressing gown. She flicked an eyebrow up at him, "Do you want a cup of coffee, oh undead father of mine?"

Castle didn't reply, but continued his shuffling until his outstretched arms were around Alexis' shoulders, then he hugged her tight, planting a kiss in her hair, "Yes please, coffee good." He was about to take a slice of her toast when she swatted his hand away.

"What kind of reward is stealing a piece of my toast for making you a coffee?" She rolled her eyes at him and his grin faded away.

"Wow, you looked just like Beckett then. Has she been teaching you how to do that?"

Alexis laughed and passed him a mug, "No, Dad, it's definitely not from Detective Beckett." Castle started to make his own toast as Alexis sat and ate hers in thoughtful silence.

"What do you have planned for today, Pumpkin?"

"I need to study for a bit later, but I was wondering if we could do something together this morning? Do you have to go to the precinct today?"

"No, I don't. And doing something together would be great," he smiled widely. "What did you have in mind?"

"Well..." she began uncertainly, "It's about your scroll. I was wondering if you wouldn't mind me looking at it again."

Castle shrugged, "Sure." He moved around the kitchen, tidying plates and mugs into the dishwasher. "Any particular reason?"

"I'm just curious. I've been trying not to ask about it, but I have so many questions and I feel like I'm going to burst if I don't ask you." He smiled at her.

"You know you can always ask me anything, right?" She responded with a nod. "Good. Let me get showered and stuff, and then the questioning can begin."

"Questioning?" Martha appeared on the stairs. "What are you going to be questioning Alexis about, Richard?"

"Can I tell her?" Alexis asked Castle, and he nodded his assent as he walked back to his room.

"She already knows. I'm going to shower."

"Tell me what, darling?" Martha turned her attention to Alexis as she poured her own coffee.

"It's about Dad's scroll. I saw it the other day, he wasn't quick enough to hide it."

Martha nodded, "Ah." She smiled, "Well, if we're going to have show and tell, I want to bring something too." She left her coffee cup and glided back upstairs, leaving Alexis still sat at the kitchen counter with a puzzled look on her face.

A few minutes later, father and grandmother reappeared. Castle carried the wooden box that Alexis recognised from his desk drawer, while Martha was carrying a slightly crumpled velvet bag that didn't look like it had seen the light of day in many years. Castle gave his mother a small smile as they sat down next to each other on the couch and beckoned to Alexis to join them.

"Would you like to start, Mother?"

"Very well..." Alexis settled into her armchair across the coffee table, tucking her feet up off the floor. "It was a dark and stormy night..." Castle laughed.

"No it wasn't!"

"Are you telling the story, or am I?" He mimed zipping his mouth shut, while trying not to grin. Alexis giggled quietly. "Hmm... now, as I was saying, it was a dark and stormy night..." Martha slipped her fingers in between her son's clasped hands, well aware that she was telling this story as much for him as for her granddaughter, and returned his smile, "...when my April Fool baby arrived."

She paused thoughtfully. "Now, I had just put him down in the little crib they have for by the bed, you know, and he was finally asleep so I thought I'd try to get some rest too. I lay back and I was just about to shut my eyes when I noticed these gold sparkles in my lap. I thought I was hallucinating from the exhaustion or something, because I certainly hadn't had anything to drink, but no. There, in my hands, appearing out of thin air, was a scroll." She reclaimed her hand from Castle's and opened the velvet bag on the coffee table.

_Oh, her ribbon is lime green, that's just perfect. How could I not remember that?_ "So you're Dad's guardian angel? Is that more important than being his mom?" Martha passed the scroll to Alexis with a small smile.

"Let's just say it gives the role a little bit of an edge." Castle chuckled indulgently.

"Can I open it, Grams?"

"Of course, kiddo." Castle leaned forward in eager anticipation to watch Alexis untie the scroll, but had a sudden thought and turned to Martha.

"Mother, what did this say when you last-..." Martha gasped and her hand flew to cover her open mouth. Alexis' eyes rose quickly to look at her grandmother.

"Grams, what's wrong?" Martha reached over to bring the scroll nearer to her, still stunned, but she recovered herself after she saw what was written.

"This was blank last time I looked."

They all exchanged glances and looked back down at the scroll, which bore the same exquisite writing as Castle's.

"_Stormy seas lie ahead."_

* * *

Alexis was the first to break the silence with a whisper, "Dad. Has yours changed?" His eyes widened and flew to hers before he scrambled to open the box. He hastily untied the ribbon and set the scroll out on the coffee table.

"_You're going to need a hammer, a chisel, and a lifeboat."_

He frowned with incomprehension. _What the..._

"Looks like you're going shopping, Richard." Castle turned to give his mother an skeptical eyebrow flick while Alexis looked between the pair of them, eyes wide with alarm.

* * *

A/N: This went in a completely unexpected direction to what I had planned. But I think I like it. I hope you do too.


End file.
